It's a tie this week.
The owners of the Chicago Cubs have filed for bankruptcy. When asked to explain, they said that spending money you don't have is how Chicagoans win the Nobel Peace Prize.
That joke writes itself. I've heard versions of it already from others, so I have to include a real-life one from my personal life:
"Do you think I'm short?"
-No, I just think you're very far away.
Lovin', touchin', squeezin'
1 day ago