Training plans, in horrid detail (part 1 of way too many)

There's a lot of ways to train for 100 miles; it seems I've tried them all and failed miserably, but there's one crazy idea left: try all of them at the same time. I tried high mileage and ended up just being tired and slow. I've tried frequent very long runs and ended up being well-trained to run just mediocre long runs frequently. I've tried training toward my strengths (short races) and hoping it carried over to long distances. I've tried getting a lot of experience by racing under differing circumstances. I've tried cross-training, briefly, and hated every minute of it. I've tried doing a lot of running on hills and difficult single-track and... I've improved at that; when was the last time I wrote about falling or dead quads?

Right now, I could run a mile in 6:00, and a marathon in about 3:30-3:40. I like to think I could run 3:15, but realistically, I'd die somewhere in the second half and run 3:35. If I trained for it, I think I could run the Superior 100 Mile in 36 hours, comfortably and, if I really trained well and specifically, could maybe run 33 hours.

I've had to do a lot of thinking lately about what I can't do. I can't do track workouts any more; turns at speed give me heel pain. I can't run very hard for more than a few minutes because of asthma - at least for now. I can't run trails quickly for more than an hour, because turning ankles cause me achilles&heel pain. I can't run for hours on roads because it gives me heel pain (yes, that's a third different type of heel pain, if you're counting). I still get back pain when running very long. And then there's finger swelling. And chafing. And so on.

Still, there's a lot I can do, and I have a plan.