"There's only one hard and fast rule in running: sometimes you have to run one hard and fast."

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Two Deaths

My aunt Agnes died Monday morning. I feel a little guilty that I don't feel bad about it, but she died 10 weeks after her husband died and 5 weeks after finding out she had cancer, and that seems like a pretty good ending to me. There's no loose ends, no unfinished business, no mess to clean up.

And that leaves me without my usual grieving process, as I tend to deal with deaths by helping others get through them. Everyone deals with death their own way. That brings me to the other death to report.

People have been wondering what happened to the ubiquitous "Glaven Q. Heisenberg" comments on this blog and those who follow his blog have been impatiently awaiting news. His sister died. It was one of those stupid tragic freak accidents and, unlike my aunt's death, the situation is messy. He's been away from the blogosphere because there were more important things to take care of.

As a true introvert, Glaven recharges his batteries by withdrawing, so it's going to be a while before we hear from him again. There's a problem with getting back to his blog: he'll feel it necessary to say why he's been away, which will require him to talk about his sister; he won't know where to begin and will probably be afraid that, once the floodgates open, he won't be able to stop. It's impossible to neatly summarize a person or one's relationship with that person, so why even try? On the other hand, he can't just drop back into writing about the Beatles or Shakespeare when there's something weighing on his mind.

So, doing what I do, I'm trying to make it easier for him by broaching the subject here. Please go to his blog and leave a comment. Then, when he feels like writing again, all he has to do is say something like "Thanks for all the kind words. I'm not ready to talk about it yet," and he can go on to write about something else. Then, some day when he's writing about something else, an anecdote about his sister will come to mind and he'll write about it. I think his posts about his brother Frank are the best things he's written; I look forward to the Cathy posts.

Glaven's fourinone blog.


GeorgiaSnail said...

Steve, I am sorry to hear about your family's loss.

I saw the comment you left on G's blog the other day and figured something of this gravity had taken place. That is just awful. I will keep his and your family in my thoughts.

Andrew said...

Wow, was it Carrie?

Sorry about your Aunt and Uncle. Sounds like a beautiful ending.

Xenia said...

Steve, I'm so sorry to hear about your aunt and uncle. And through all of this you are still able to be an amazing and supportive friend to G. You are truly a remarkable person. Hugs, buddy.

SteveQ said...

Andrew: No, not Carrie. I guess I should note her blog as well.

nwgdc said...

Steve, thanks for posting this...how thoughtful. My sympathies to your family as well.

carrie said...

Thank you for your message and for thinking of me.

Glaven is my bloggy big brother, not my real one. I'm positive we were siblings during a previous experience here, and as much as my heart hurts for him, it is also touched by you and your thoughtfulness. Hugs.

carrie said...

No worries! A lot of people out here think it, it makes me feel kinda happy. :)

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

This post is still the number one source of traffic to my blog. Just wanted to acknowledge that and say thanks again, Steve.

Also, I wanted to offer my condolences on your recent losses.

I'm glad we finally got Sister Carrie's true relationship to me worked out. I thought you already knew she wasn't my sister-by-blood.

Now I know you do.

Take care.

SteveQ said...

@G: I knew that, but somehow the fact just disappeared from my brain for a bit.

This post got more traffic than usual, though not many commenters.