"There's only one hard and fast rule in running: sometimes you have to run one hard and fast."

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Rant and Resolution

I've resolved to be nicer in 2011... in general, for the most part, when appropriate, if I feel like it... so, if I'm going to rant, maybe this is my last chance.

I went to a local bookstore, which is a bit of a misnomer, as it's not really conveniently located. They had a section of works by local authors recently published and the selection shows what a vibrant writing community there is here. Here were the books of poetry:

Ceremonies of the Spirit (Plain View Press) by Wendy Brown-Baez
Calling (Loonfeather Press) by Sharon Chmielarz
The Sky Is Great, the Sky Is Blue (Whistling Shade Press) by Sharon Chmielarz
All This and More (Nodin Press) by Carol Connolly
Tommy (Red Dragonfly Press) by Donna Isaac
I Wish I Had a Heart Like Yours, Walt Whitman (Univ. of Notre Dame Press) by Jude Nutter
Unrest (Graywolf Press) by Joanna Rawson
What's Left Is the Singing (Blue Light Press) by Mary Kay Rummel
When I looked Back You Were Gone (Holy Cow Press) by Cary Waterman

Do I even have to say it?

Not only weren't there any male authors, there were no male employees in the store and I was the only male customer. Apparently, men don't read; they don't think; they don't feel. Or, maybe they're just like me and get queasy around "Loonfeather" and "Whistling Shade." Blecch. Now, where are the car repair manuals...


Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

Walk It Off: A Manly Poem By A REAL Man

Go ahead, you f*ckin yutz -
Take yer best shot at my nuts!
Please feel free to laugh and scoff
While I quickly Walk It Off.

Now it's MY turn, Sunny Jim -
I RIPPED YERS OFF, you former-him!
You girly man! You estro-whore!
Go sell your pomes at SteveQ's store!

For you're no man! You never were!
My gonads have more manly fur!
To all the skirts who read this rhyme -
Have I turned you all on this time?

SteveQ said...

I wondered why it was taking so long for you to respond, G. Should've known this was coming.

The last line doesn't scan. Wouldn't matter, except the others have a sort of sing-song quality.

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

I decided to get all anapestic up in this place, can a bruvva get a whut whut!

Just FORCE that last line to to be iambic! What are you? A GIRL!

"have I turned YOU all ON this TIME?"

RBR said...

1. No offense, but that is the girliest "rant" EVER.

2. Between you and your poetry and fucking G and his Shakespeare, I am getting the feeling you are trying to make me feel stupid and go away.

Not likely, suckers! It takes a lot less than that to make me feel stupid!

So, ha!

Did ya miss me?! *smooches*

sea legs girl said...

Are you sure Jude Nutter isn't a guy? Not that the name works particularly well for either sex...

SteveQ said...

@SLG: As sure as one can be without "checking under the hood."

You should talk. Finnbjorn? Why not name the baby Tubbo?

@RBR: You went to Hawaii while I chipped ice dams. Now who's the dummy?