People magazine chose Ryan Reynolds as the sexiest man alive this year. How did I get passed over yet again? I mean, make the comparison: Tall? check. Under 10% body fat? check. Once wore a Green Lantern costume (or was that Green Hornet)? check. Slept with Scarlett Johansson? no [but that's because I have too high standards. If a woman's named Scarlett, she should have red hair. Case in point: Scarlett Pomers. That also goes for Ginger, Ruby, Rose...]
I think they decided against me because of the sock story. I went for a run and afterward discovered I had run out of clean socks, but didn't have time to do laundry, so I tossed the sweaty ones I just wore in the dryer with a bar of scented soap and said that that was good enough. Definitely lost sexy points there.
Still, I had to be in the running, right? Check it out, me taking a shower:
The kid in the background can't take his eyes off me, I'm so sexy.
12 comments:
If a woman's named Scarlett, she should have red hair. [...] That also goes for Ginger, Ruby, Rose...
So by this logic, Hedy Lamarr would have to be pretty good at ... something or other ... perhaps some talent she might have in common with Oral Roberts...?
Can you blame him? Look at that rump shaker you are packin'.
Sure. Now I see what 'direction' yo uare taking this blog.
This is the trial membership period, right?
Then all of a sudden my credit card is getting billed for "adult entertainment photographs"
@Ewa: "Rump shaker", lol!
For the record, I prefer my porn free, but I will make an exception for post-ultra shower pictures.
Call it a fetish.
;)
@ Glaven, you really are my brother. Only people in my family know who Hedy Lamar is (and why Rock Ridge was Rock Ridge!)
Steve...Rock Ridge really WAS that wonderful! (and thanks for your comments. So many people have shared with me their expression of emotion during/after running when I tell them how I fell apart at the marathon finish. Just another reason I love running...and other runners.)
Was it Coast soap? If so you are off the hook. Irish Spring might be okay too.
I think you are the only person who could get me to click on a link called "Scarlett Pomers". I'm debating whether or not I should thank you.
Ryan Reynolds? Who knew that the guy from "Two Guys, A Girl and a Pizza Place" would achieve such an honor? :)
Hilarious as usual!
@SUAR: poetic license, actually. I used tiny scented votive candles, which melted in the dryer.
@SLG: Hadn't seen a pic of that Scarlett in a few years; that's a big change in style from the shy precocious teenager I remember.
@Emz: Had to google "rump shaker" cuz I couldn't get past an old school rap reference that didn't seem to apply. Thanx, I guess.
My secret's out- sometimes I read blog posts simply based on the title, and I could not resist. Glad you did not disappoint!Hilarious!
yeah...Ryan Reynolds...not remarkable
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